


The Days of IMF Agents Lives

by Kerry_0506



Category: Mission: Impossible (Movies)
Genre: Angst, Drabble Collection, Fluff, Humor, Hurt/Comfort, Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-09-21
Updated: 2015-10-27
Packaged: 2018-04-22 17:50:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 20
Words: 15,465
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4844786
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kerry_0506/pseuds/Kerry_0506
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A collection of drabbles based off prompts. Ships and characters vary. Chapter title will be characters involved, the prompt and any additional info will be in the notes.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Ethan/Benji

**Author's Note:**

> Chapter 1: “You need to wake up because I can’t do this without you.”

He remembered the car crash in Morocco, the way the vehicle flipped multiple times before coming to a shattering halt on its roof. Well, actually, he didn’t exactly remember much of that, since he had hit his head pretty badly and wound up unconscious on the umpteenth flip. But he recalled the fear he had felt as they had flown backwards through that gate and hurtled towards the ground, recalled Ethan screaming for him to hang on before they made painful contact with the floor. He had genuinely thought they were going to die that day and yet, somehow they managed to make it.

But this… This was different.

This wasn’t them being chased by Syndicate agents on motorbikes with weapons. No, this was an ordinary night driving back from their anniversary dinner, a time when there was supposed to be no danger. This was a stupid young driver thinking that he was ‘cool’ by speeding around a corner blindly. Benji knew that he had been driving, but all he recalled was waking up in the hospital bed, with Jane and Will standing over him telling him that he had been out for just short of three days. But the only word on his lips at that point was Ethan’s name.

Two surgeries and what felt like a billion observations later, Ethan was placed into an induced coma and Benji’s world seemed to come crashing down. When he was finally discharged from the hospital, he never left, merely setting up his new residence in the uncomfortable chair next to Ethan’s bed. It felt strange to see him like this, so fragile and fractured as he lay swamped in the blankets of the bed, making him seem so small. He listened to the beeping of the monitors around the older agent, watching the slow yet very real rise and fall of his chest as he lay there and he clung onto those things as though they were a lifeline. It was his one sign that Ethan was alive and he knew that he had to focus on that to avoid completely cracking.

Cautiously, he reached out, taking Ethan’s hand into his own and letting his thumb trace gentle circles on his palm.

“Ethan, please come back…” he whispered, tears rolling down his cheeks. “You need to wake up because I can’t do this without you. I can’t… You’re the only thing worth living for.” He let his head drop down against his boyfriend’s chest, his body shaking as he finally let go of his emotions and at the door, Will’s arm wrapped around Jane as they watched their friends helplessly.


	2. Benji & Lane

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 2: “No one needs to know.” (Note: this is not a ship related drabble.)

The sound of Benji’s agony seemed to echo around them and the blond could only wonder whether anyone else in the vicinity could actually hear him. He had lost count of how many blows to the chest and stomach he had taken, Vinter’s strength proving itself with each hit. He could almost feel the heat of fresh bruises beginning to grow underneath his shirt and he wondered how many more hits it would take before his ribs began to give out.

A slender, bony hand lifted into the air and Vinter’s attack immediately stopped, Benji’s eyes falling on Lane’s face as the man approached.

“Come now, Benjamin.” His voice sent a chill down Benji’s spine. “You are merely prolonging your own suffering by refusing my offer.” Then, Lane leaned in close, just as he had when Benji had first regained consciousness, and looked him right in the eyes. The tech could feel the man’s warm breath on his skin and he shifted as far back in the chair as he could, looking away. But he soon felt Vinter’s rough hand in his hair, forcing him to look at Lane and he met those cold eyes once more.

“I’d pay attention if I were you.” Vinter’s voice spoke up, seeming so loud in comparison to Lane’s near whisper.

“No one needs to know, Benjamin. It can be our little secret.” Lane’s lips twitched up into the faintest of smirked as he waited for his answer.

“I already told you.” Benji replied, through gritted teeth. “I’ll die before I agree to anything you say. I’m not going to betray my friends and I’m certainly not going to work for you.” He watched as Lane’s smirk fell a little and he stood up straight, Vinter shoving Benji’s head forwards.

“Such a shame.” Lane said, walking away, hands clasped behind his back. “You are a man of such talent, Benjamin, and it will be a waste to see you die. But your unwavering loyalties to Ethan are clear.“ Lane then reached into a briefcase, lifting out a small syringe before turning back to his prisoner. “I suppose it is about time we got you ready for your dear Ethan.” Benji immediately began to struggle against his restraints, but Vinter’s hands were soon on him once more, holding him still and forcing his head to the side. Lane approached his exposed neck and brought down the syringe to his skin. “Pleasant dreams, Benjamin.”


	3. Brandt & Ethan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 3: “I think we need to talk.” (Note: this is not a ship related drabble.)

“I think we need to talk.”

Those six words were ones that Ethan never really liked to hear. Especially since they were coming from the man who had yelled at him multiple times in the last twenty four hours and no doubt blamed him for what had happened. But he knew that he could not avoid whatever it was that Brandt wanted to speak to him about, because he was a stubborn man and there was no way he would let anything go unsaid.

“Sure. What is it?” he asked, looking up from where he sat on the jet. Hunley had allowed the four of them to use his jet to return to DC while he remained in London to smooth things over with the British government. Luther was currently attempting to play chess with himself and Benji was getting some well deserved sleep on the sofa, though all three men were keeping an eye on him in case he woke. They knew that he would not be in the best of ways after what he went through.

Brandt sat down opposite Ethan and sighed, looking around as if trying to search for the words that he needed to say.

“Ethan, I wanted to apologise to you.” Ethan’s brow creased at the comment, but before he could speak up, Brandt continued. “I shouldn’t have yelled at you. You knew what you were doing and you’re supposed to have my trust. I doubted you and I shouldn’t have done that.”

“Brandt, it’s ok. I get it.” Ethan leaned his elbows on the table between them and met the other agent’s gaze. “We were stuck between a rock and a hard place. First about warning MI6 and then when Benji…” Ethan’s voice trailed off as his eyes fell on Benji’s sleeping form, shoulders slumping. “You were just worried about him, we all were. You needed someone to blame.”

“I know, but that shouldn’t have been you.” Brandt’s voice was sincere as he uttered the words, his head shaking slightly. “I guess it was just instinct. Lane had Benji and he was only really involved in all of this because he would blindly follow you into the end of the world if you asked him to and I just lashed out. I’m sorry.”

Ethan knew that there would be no point in disputing the apology, even though he did not feel that he needed one. Instead, he simply nodded, a small trace of a smile on his lips as he sat back in his chair. He could see that some of the tension had seemed to have left Brandt’s shoulders and that was a good sign. They had all experienced hell these last few days, so they would be on edge for a while and the sooner he could help his friends recover from that, the better.


	4. Benji/Brandt

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 4: “I almost lost you.” (This was also posted as a stand alone fic, but I figured I'd include it here.)

A billion and one things were rushing through Will’s mind at that moment and for the first time in what he was sure was his entire life, he couldn’t keep track of them all. The events from the few days that had just passed them were muddled up in his mind, though one thought seemed to be pushing to the forefront.

_LaneHunley **Benji** SyndicateIlsaMorocco **Benji** CarCrashEthan **Benji** LondonLedgerPrimeMinisterCIAMI6 **BenjiBenjiBENJI**_

As they made their way from dropping off Lane to their safe house, all he could do was stare at Benji, who seemed to be miles away as he drove them there, and think back on their decision to take a break. Everything had crumbled slightly around them and they agreed that to avoid it collapsing around them completely, they would take a break in their relationship. Sadly, things had been rather awkward between them during their time at the CIA and Will had begun to wonder if they would actually be able to fix the cracks in their relationship at all.

But now, he knew. He knew that they had to make a decision and he had already planned out making his move. Once they reached the safe house, he watched Benji entering his bedroom, shutting the door behind him, and he sighed. He couldn’t be sure if Benji would even want to try and fix things, but he could not let these words go unspoken. Not after that day. Crossing the room, he gently knocked on Benji’s door and pushed it open, finding the blond slowly, very slowly, taking off his jacket. His movements were stiff, deliberate and clearly pained and Will’s stomach turned.

“Benji?” His voice was soft, barely more than a whisper so as not to startle the younger man.

“What is it, Brandt?” Benji asked, tossing his jacket on the bed and turning to face him. It was only now that Will could really see, in the dim light of the bedside lamp, just how broken Benji was. His blue eyes no longer seemed to hold that sparkle that they once had, his once laughter lines more evident of exhaustion than happiness. His skin was paler than usual and he looked about ready to collapse. It took everything that Will had not to just rush to the man there and then and gather him into his arms.

“Benji, we really need to talk about-”

“Talk about what? I just want to sleep, ok?” Benji replied, moving to pull off his shirt, not caring if Will saw. As he peeled it off, even slower than the jacket, Will slowly saw that his torso was decorated with bruises of varying sizes, some lightly coloured, others a dark, vicious shade of purple.

“Jesus, Benji… Why didn’t you say something?” Now, Will couldn’t help moving closer, hands reaching out and his fingertips gently tracing over one bruise near his shoulder. He felt Benji shudder under the touch and looked up to see his eyes closed.

“Will…” Brandt’s eyes fell on the way Benji’s Adams apple moved as the technician swallowed and he could not stop himself. He leaned in and brushed his lips against Benji’s, halting just for one moment to allow Benji the chance to pull away, and when he did not, Will closed the remaining gap. He kept the kiss short and oh so tender, not wanting to overdo it just yet. He already knew that he was walking a very fine line with his actions. When he pulled back, he rested his forehead against the blond’s and let out a shaky breath.

“I almost lost you, Benji. I almost lost the man I love and I never would have had the chance to make things right.” Benji opened his mouth to speak but was silenced by a single finger on his lips. “When Lane took you, all I could think about was the fact that I might never see you again and it reminded me of how much you mean to me. I can’t do that again, Benji. I won’t. Please, let’s try this again. Properly this time.” There was a moment of silence that followed, almost borderlining on too long and Will was preparing himself for the shattering sound of rejection, but then he felt one warm, slightly sweaty hand slipping into his own and he relaxed. Instead of responding verbally, Benji simply tugged on his hand and pulled him towards the bed, needing to feel the warmth of Will next to him once more. Less than two minutes later, the pair were in the bed, Will curled protectively around Benji as the younger agent hand his hand on Will’s chest, the steady drumming of his heartbeat giving him something to cling to as he slowly drifted to sleep.


	5. Benji/Ethan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 5: “I’m pregnant.” (Note: Not mpgreg.)

“Benji, I need you to-”

“Not right now, Ethan.” The blond was engrossed by whatever it was that he was doing on the computer and Ethan had to roll his eyes. He had been sat there since they got home, trying to figure out something that had gone wrong on their last mission and it seemed that he would not leave the desk until he had figured it out. But Ethan was getting a little irritated. It was getting close to midnight and Ethan had been dying to get Benji in bed for the last three hours, but to no avail. Usually the prospect of sex would easily ensnare the younger agent, but this time, he was too far gone in his work to even notice when Ethan had tried touching himself as a distraction.

But, as he had once informed newly appointed Secretary Hunley, desperate times caused for desperate measures.

“Benji I really need to tell you som-”

“Ethan I really need you to stop interrup-”

“I’m pregnant.”

Success. Benji froze at the computer and turned to face him, his expression deadpanned as he looked up at Ethan. “Ethan, don’t be ridiculous, that is not even possi- hey!” He was sadly too distracted by pointing out the stupidity in Ethan’s comment to stop his boyfriend from slamming his laptop shut and dragging him from the chair. “I was working!”

“And now, you will be working on me. You owe me a blow job for making me wait so long.” Ethan’s hand was firmly locked around Benji’s wrist as he tugged him along to their bedroom and Benji snorted.

“You know, you really need to make your punishments a little less enticing, Agent Hunt.”


	6. Benji & Jane

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 6: “I’m pregnant.” (Note: this is an AU in which Hanaway is still alive and is in a happy relationship with Jane because they deserve to be happy.)

Benji could tell from the minute he had heard Jane’s voice down the phone asking him to meet her that something was going on. There was a kind of spark in her tone that he had not heard for quite a while and his mind was running wild with what she might have wanted to tell him.

He drove to the local coffee shop where they would often meet on their days off for lunch and parked up in his usual spot - somehow it was always empty ready for him. He locked up his Dodge and made his way around the building to the front entrance, spotting Jane sitting at a booth sipping at a glass of water. With a smile, he pushed open the door and crossed the room to her, kissing her cheek as he moved to sit down.

“So, what was it that you couldn’t tell me over the phone, huh?” he asked, taking the seat opposite her and removing his satchel, placing it next to him. He could see that she was already fighting back a grin, which reassured him that it was definitely positive.

“I’m pregnant.” Benji’s eyes went wide at the words, jaw dropping slightly. He almost managed to spill the water he had been pouring himself, stopping it just before it overflowed from the edge of the glass.

“Pregnant? As in there’s a baby growing in your stomach right now?” he asked, watching her nod and he had to hold back a yell of joy. He stood once more and rounded the table, hugging her tightly (but not too tightly, of course). “God this is amazing! Congratulations!”

“Thanks, Benj.” Jane replied, the most genuine smile on her face that Benji had seen in a long time. He was thrilled for her, sitting back down as he ran a hand over his hair. “You’re one of the first people I’ve told. Outside of mine and Trevor’s parents, of course.”

“Well… I’m honoured.” Benji’s grin never left his face. “Have you and him talked about how this will fit in with, you know, work?”

“We’ve not really discussed anything yet, it’s still early days. But we’ll make it work.” she explained, her smile still remaining yet a slightly serious look in her eyes. Raising a baby while working for IMF wouldn’t exactly be a piece of cake, but one thing was for sure; that child would be one of the most protected in the world. With himself, Ethan, Brandt, Luther and Ilsa all there to help, they would help Jane and Hanaway in any way they could.

“Of course. You guys can figure out anything.” Benji said, lifting his glass in a toast, tapping it against Jane’s.

“There’s one other thing that we have figured out, though.” Jane began, placing down her drink. “We would love you to be our child’s godfather.” For the second time in just a few moments, Benji was rendered momentarily speechless. “Would that be ok with you?”

“Ok with me? Jane…. Bloody hell, of course it would. It would be my privilege.” His cheeks were beginning to hurt from smiling so much, but this was huge. He was humbled that Jane and Hanaway wanted him to be such a big part of their kid’s life and he would do everything he could to fulfill his duties.


	7. Benji/Brandt

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 7: One sentence per genre

**Angst**

Benji stared at Will as the analyst walked away, suitcase in hand and tears began to roll down his cheeks as he wondered what possibly could have gone so wrong.

**AU**

It wasn’t unlikely that the entire office had noticed their CEO constantly staring at the new technician who was currently fixing his computer; his eyes on the blond’s arse were kind of a dead giveaway.

**Crack**

Benji stared between Will and his apparent twin brother and he was certain that his mind had just imploded.

**Future fic**

“Benjamin Dunn,” Will began, reaching into his pocket, “I should have done this so much sooner, but I guess almost losing you kicked my ass into gear; will you marry me?”

**First Time**

Once they finished, their sweat covered foreheads pressed together, Will did not move yet, wanting to remain inside for just a little longer and savor every moment of this.

**Fluff**

Almost every night, Benji would ask the same question, though tonight was the first night he received an answer; “You’re always the little spoon because you fit perfectly against me, now go to sleep.”

**Humor**

“Benjamin Dunn stop laughing or so help me god, I will replace your shampoo with pink hair dye.”

**Hurt/Comfort**

The first night after Lane’s imprisonment, neither of them got much sleep, Will sitting next to Benji under the warm stream of the shower as the Brit scrubbed at his arms trying to wash away the invisible hand prints left by Vinter and Lane.

**Smut**

Oh how it felt so beautiful to be back here, with Benji in his arms, the touch of skin on skin, feeling that familiar warmth as their bodies moved as one together and Will could only think to himself ‘Never again’.

**UST (Unresolved Sexual Tension)**

“Will, I know it’s more comfortable but could you not walk around in your underwear while I’m working, it is highly distracting.”


	8. Benji/Ethan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 8: One sentence per genre

**Angst**

As the building went up in flames that seemed to reach the sky, Benji could do nothing but stare and hope that Ethan would get out of there alive.

**AU**

“This is the man you will be liaising with,” the General began, “Major William Cage, meet Inspector Nicholas Angel.”

**Crack**

“Ethan, what’s this Hunley is telling me about a ‘Stacee Jaxx’?”

**Future fic**

When he awoke to the sound of crying through the monitor, Benji felt relief in the small whisper of “Sleep, I’ll go.” from Ethan and he rolled over without even opening his eyes once.

**First Time**

It had been far too long for Benji, but Ethan’s hand through his hair and the gentle coaxing in the words “Relax, baby.” were certainly helping his nerves.

**Fluff**

The credits for the film began to roll and Ethan glanced down, unable to help the fond smile on his lips as he took in the sight of Benji, curled up like a ball with his head on his lap, and he really didn’t have the heart to wake him up. 

**Humor**

“Ethan, I get that it was sexy, but a splinter in my arse marks the last time we ever have sex on the table.”

**Hurt/Comfort**

Ethan took in the sight of the bruising and small abrasions that decorated Benji’s torso and as he clenched his fists, he was overwhelmed with the conclusion that prison would never be enough punishment for Solomon Lane.

**Smut**

_Six months was a long time…_ was the thought that ran through the forefront of Benji’s mind as Ethan continued to pound him into the wall; the bed could wait for the next round.

**UST (Unresolved Sexual Tension)**

Ethan’s eyes fell to the pen that Benji was sucking on and while out loud, he voiced the warning of the blond getting ink in his mouth, his mind couldn’t help wondering what else those lips would be good at sucking.


	9. Benji/Ethan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 9: "a fluffy benji/ethan fic with protective!ethan"

_“Ethan, we might have a problem.”_

They were words that Ethan never liked to hear, even at the best of times. It was so much worse when the phrase came without explanation; what was their problem? How serious was the problem? But those words became a million times harder to swallow when they came in the form of Benji’s soft English accent.

“Benji, what do you mean ‘might have a problem’?” Ethan replied, keeping his voice calm as he walked through the building they had managed to break into. He had retrieved the files from the building’s library and he was making his way back to the exit. Their plan was to rendezvous at their safehouse at 2300 hours before readying themselves to leave. But with Benji’s little comment, Ethan began to feel concern that their plan might not be going exactly how they intended

Then again, though, when did any plan go right with them?

“Benji.” He said again, a little more firm this time.

 _“Uh… There’s… It seems that this system has been set to trigger a detonation if anyone attempts to hack it.”_ Benji replied, voice very clearly panicked. _“Must be their way of clearing up any evidence at this location.”_

“So what are you saying? This place is going to blow?” Ethan asked, his pace picking up without him having to think about it.

 _“What I’m saying is, you really need to get out of the building right now.”_ Over the comm, Benji could be heard gathering up his things, a few items dropping to the ground.

“What’s your twenty?” Ethan asked, making his way through the hall towards the building’s main exit. He pushed through the doors and moved as far from the building as he could, ignoring the part of him that wanted to turn around and find Benji.

 _“I’m just leaving my position now. Gonna b-line for th-”_ Benji’s voice disappeared and the line became static, causing Ethan’s panic to grow threefold.

“Benji? Benji, do you copy?” Ethan turned to face the building once more and, after pocketing the files, he ran at full speed back towards the doors. When he was several meters away from the entrance, an extreme force threw him backwards, the sound of the explosion knocking him dizzy. He landed on his back as debris fell around him, the heat from the flames almost burning even from its distance. It took a moment for his equilibrium to return to normal but even before that had happened, he was up and moving, staggering to his feet.

“Benji!” The sight of the burning remains of the building reflected in his green eyes, the flames flickering in the tears that were forming. Benji couldn’t be dead, couldn’t be. He limped over to the pile of bricks and fire, stumbling over some of the fallen debris as he called out again. “Benji!” His voice was desperate, wavering as he tried to hold back his emotions. There was a small part of him that hoped, that felt that maybe he had made it out in time, but the sight before him combined with the fact that he had lost contact with his partner moments before the explosion had happened. Staring out over the destroyed building, his eyes were wide and his mouth agape, trying to figure out his next move. This had not been a possible outcome for them, they had not planned for this. For the first time in a long time, he felt lost.

The idea of Benji being taken from him again, this time with no way of preventing it, ate at him from inside, making nausea rise up within him and he fought to keep it down. He was so focused on the utter mess of thoughts and feelings within his mind that he did not sense the presence of someone that had approached him from behind.

“What’re you looking for?” A voice spoke up. A voice with a highly familiar accent. Ethan spun around to see those familiar blue eyes to accompany that voice and he almost thought he might collapse with relief. Instead, in a moment of insanity, he gripped Benji’s shoulders and shook him ever so slightly.

“Benji what- don’t you ever, ever, do that to me again!” he exclaimed, face turning pink with his overwhelming mixture of fear and relief. He paused for a moment to study Benji, noticing that his clothes and face were decorated with smoke and some already drying blood painted his right cheek. But he was alive.

“Not like I meant to.” Benji replied, reaching up and placing one of his own hands over Ethan’s. “But I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you. The comms went down and I figured finding an escape would be a better use of my time than trying to fix it.”

Ethan’s face changed, his entire demeanour relaxing as he released a breathy, near manic laugh. “You… Almost gave me a heart attack.” He said, reaching out and cupping Benji’s chin with one hand.

“Yeah, well welcome to the world of Benji Dunn, constantly thinking that his partner’s antics will be the death of him before his actual job is.” Benji replied with one of his trademark grins and that sight alone reassured Ethan that Benji was truly alright.

“Let’s get out of here.” The older agent said, tugging on Benji’s shirt. “You stink of burnt… everything.” His comment was met with an offended look from Benji.

“Rude.”


	10. Benji/Ethan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 10: "Benji finally gets to wear a mask." (Note: this took an angsty turn so be warned!)

Seventeen hours and forty three minutes.

Not that Ethan was counting. Not like he had been flicking his eyes to the clock on the wall, which suddenly felt sickeningly loud, every few moments.

Seventeen hours and forty four minutes.

Each second seemed to last a lifetime, dragging out forever as he waited. He watched Luther’s fingers flying over the keyboard as he continued his search. As soon as they had a lock on the location, they would be ready to go.

Because it had now been seventeen hours and forty five minutes since Benji had been taken.

The moment had seemed all too familiar to Ethan, memories of London rushing back to him. Although this time, he had actually witnessed it happen. It had been an awful seventeen hours since that had happened, but now, for the first time they were finally managing to hone in on Benji’s location. All they could do was hope and pray that they would not be too late. It was too much like London, except this time, they had no time frame. There was no ransom call, no demands in exchange for Benji’s life. Not a single guarantee that they found find him alive. But the trio had made the agreement that even if it was nothing more than a body they found, they would still bring Benji home.

“I got him.” Luther’s voice broke Ethan from his stupor, snapping him to attention as he rushed over to his friend.

“Where is he?” Ethan asked, seeing Brandt moving out of the corner of his eye.

“Looks like they’ve got him in a loft about ten miles from here.”

“Great work, Luther.” Ethan patted him on the back and moved quickly, grabbing his gun and jacket. “Brandt, grab the med kit for the car.” He didn’t want to think like that, but there was a high chance that Benji could be injured. After the last time, Ethan would take extra precautions. He exited the safe house with absolute faith that Luther and Brandt were behind him. The all cared for Benji, both of the other men knew how much Benji meant to Ethan, and after what happened with Lane, all three refused to come that close to losing him again.

Luther drove with Brandt in the passenger seat, Ethan in the back of the van ready to jump out as soon as they had come to a halt – though, knowing Ethan, the others were certain that he would be out of the van while it was still moving. The journey took far longer than any of them wanted, time seeming to pass so slowly, every set of traffic lights seeming to turn red just for them. But soon enough, the van was screeching to a halt outside of the building and Ethan was all but throwing himself out of the back. His feet barely hit the ground as he ran, not needing to check if Brandt and Luther were behind him. His only focus was getting into that loft, finding Benji and putting a bullet in man who dared take him away from them.

The loft was dark, stuffy and warm, causing all three men to immediately feel uncomfortable. The moved silently through the building, guns at the ready as they took each cautious step one after another. Then, Luther caught movement in the dim light, causing them to freeze on the spot. A figure stood a few meters away from them, wearing a hood and holding a gun. The man’s features were older than all three agents, a worn face that Ethan instantly recognised. This was the man running this show. This was the man who had brought the butt of a gun down on Benji’s head and dragged him away. All three agents raised their weapons and aimed.

“Where is he?” Ethan demanded, watching the stranger closely for any movement. One wrong turn and this man would have a bullet in him. Silence followed, causing Ethan to try again, this time a little more desperate. “What have you done with him?” His voice seemed to cut the silence like a blade, his voice echoing a little. When no answer came once more, Ethan readied himself to ask again, this time a little more violently, but then he saw it. Right arm beginning to raise, the weapon gripped firmly in his hand. Ethan’s gaze never left the man as he tried to formulate some kind of plan in his head. But instead, with Benji’s safety on his mind, he did the one thing that came instinctively.

He pulled the trigger.

The bullet hit the man in the right shoulder, sending him sprawling to the ground, the gun hitting the concrete with an awfully loud sound and now he could see the man’s blood splattered across the wall from the impact.

As he went down, however, something strange happened. Instead of a loud cry of pain, or anything that would have been expected, there came a soft muffled whimper as the man collapsed and Ethan rushed over to him, kicking the gun away from the stranger. Luther and Brandt stood around him, eyes flicking around the loft for any signs of movement. Pulling off the hood of the man’s jacket, he spotted an earpiece in his ear and the sounds coming from their assailant caused Ethan a growing amount of concern. Cautiously, he reached down under the jacket and his stomach turned. This was a mask. His heart was pounding against his chest almost painfully as he tugged at the mask, silently begging this not to be what he feared, but when the stranger’s face was completely removed, Ethan thought he might vomit.

“Benji…” His partner’s expression was pained, his face decorated with small cuts and bruises. There was a gag forced roughly between his lips, explaining the silence and Ethan could only assume that the earpiece was being used for similar reasons to Lane’s. Someone ordering Benji to remain silent, likely with some threat. Someone ordering Benji to raise that gun so that Ethan would shoot him. The older agent could not help feeling glad that he did not shoot to kill.

“Christ, Benji I’m so sorry.” Tears stung as Ethan’s eyes as he pulled the gag from Benji’s mouth, hearing a hiss of pain as he then pressed down on the wound. Blood. So much blood.

_Benji’s blood._

“T-They left… They’re not here.” Benji forced out, looking up at Ethan with eyes filled with agony.

“Shh… Don’t…” Ethan did not know what to say. He had just shot his own partner, he pulled the trigger on the man he loved. How could he have done that?

“Not your fault, Ethan.” Benji breathed as if reading Ethan’s very thoughts. When Ethan tried to shush him again, Benji shook his head, determined to avoid the older man’s impending guilt. “Please… Not your fault. You didn’t know.”

So many responses formed in Ethan’s mind. _I should have known. I shouldn’t have pulled the trigger. I should have tried to knock the gun from your hand first._ But none of them could come out as his focus was drawn to the fast growing red stain on Benji’s light grey shirt. He tried to think on the fact that the location of the wound would be less fatal than other parts of Benji’s body, but it did not manage to dispel the overwhelming sense of guilt that was consuming him from the inside out. And even if this was a little less fatal, it did not mean that it was less serious. They had to get him out of there. His own words resounded in his mind, words spoken firmly in the dim light of a canal boat in Vienna.

_“I can’t protect you.”_

Those words echoed out loud as he muttered to Benji. “I should have protected you. I shouldn’t have let this happen again.” The soft touch of Benji’s hand found its way to his own and he looked into Benji’s blue eyes.

“Not your job to protect me, Ethan.” He replied, voice soft. “I know the risks, remember?”

“Doesn’t mean you have to take them, though.” Ethan pointed out, resulting in a small laugh from the blond. “Just hold on, ok? We’ll get you out of here.”

“I know you will, Ethan.” Benji’s smile was a little more genuine this time, though the pain he was in was still evident through his eyes.

Eyes that were beginning to grow heavier.

“No, no, no, Benji don’t do that.” Ethan begged, gently tapping Benji’s cheek with his bloodied hand. “Stay with me, ok? You’re not allowed to sleep until I say so, got it?”

“I’ll try.” Benji replied, voice groggy and Ethan panicked, throwing all caution out of the window. He stood on the spot, scooping Benji into his arms and shouting to Luther and Brandt.

“We have to go. Now!” He moved as fast as he could towards the exit, trying not to jostle Benji too much. “Come on, Benj. Stay awake. Just a bit longer.” He could see the way Benji was so clearly fighting to keep his eyes open, losing blood too quickly, and he felt his stomach twisting into knots, at the thought of possibly losing Benji. He had come far too close to losing him in London and he had vowed to never let things get that far again. But now, here he was, rushing Benji’s battered and bleeding body to the van with nothing more than hope to get him through. And the worst part was, if it happened… If they lost him, it was Ethan who had pulled the trigger.

Once he had Benji in the back of the van, he grabbed a pocket knife from a nearby box of equipment and sliced open Benji’s shirt, seeing the blood that coated his pale skin.

“Why aren’t we moving?!” Ethan yelled, hands shaking as he used Benji’s ruined shirt to press down more on the wound. He glanced over his shoulder to see the other two men climbing into the van, immediately starting up the engine. “Quickly! God, Benj, please hold on.” He turned back to face the Brit and his heart almost stopped. Benji’s eyes were closed and he lay there, motionless. “Benji?” He leant in and listened for breathing as he felt his fear rising. “Benji!”


	11. Benji/Ethan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 11: Knight & Day AU "a non-spy benji instead of cameron's character and ethan as roy"

It was a nice quiet day so far.

Everything had been quiet for him since the plane crash; well, aside from the constant attacks of messages checking if he was alright. All he had wanted was a nice trip back to London for his brother’s wedding, but apparently that was too much to ask for. He wasn’t even sure if his memories of the flight were entirely accurate, since the concept of one handsome stranger single handedly killing everyone on board, crash landing the plane and telling him that apparently there would be some men after him seemed a little too farfetched to him. It was probably just a dream he had while recovering, no doubt.

At least, that is what he told himself. It helped him sleep better at night.

After meeting his brother for a suit fitting, he had decided to take himself out for a coffee. Everyone deserved a date with themselves every once in a while. He picked a nice quiet corner booth, ordering himself a cappuccino with extra sugar and cream, before pulling his book from his backpack and picking up where he left off. So far, it had been a good read – at least, it had been before his reading on the plane had been rudely interrupted by murder and mayhem. But now, life would be back to normal and he could just focus on his best man speech. His coffee was delivered and he thanked the waitress, pushing his glasses back up his nose as he reached for it. The coffee had always been good here and it was certainly something that he missed while working in Washington DC; shame he could not get Jonathan to post some coffee to go for him once in a while. Knowing his brother, he probably would try.

As he went back to his book, he sensed someone else sitting down opposite him at the table and even before he saw him, the voice alerted him to who it was.

“What’re you reading?” Benji lifted his head and saw the man from the plane sitting opposite him.

“You…”

The man’s brow creased a little. “You’re… Reading me?”

“What the-“ Benji looked around, hushing his voice before continuing. “Bloody hell are you doing here?”

“Having a coffee.” The man said plainly, watching as the same waitress brought him a coffee. He smiled gratefully, looking back to Benji, meeting his wide eyed expression.

“Not with me. You’ve caused me enough trouble as it is.” Benji said, pointedly, knocking back as much of his coffee as he could in one go before tossing a five pound note onto the table and packing up his book.

“Benjamin, please.”

“Please what?” Benji replied, looking back to him. “Look… I don’t even know your name-“

“Ethan.”

“I don’t wanna know!” He caught a few people looking at him, but ignored them. “I just wanna get through my brother’s wedding and then get back to DC. I didn’t sign up for any of this.”

“I know you didn’t, but you need to listen to me. They saw you with me on that plane.” Ethan seemed a little desperate now, but Benji just shook his head.

“I wasn’t with you. We were sitting two rows apart and talked for like ten minutes.”

“To them, that’s enough.” Ethan’s green eyes searched the Brit’s and Benji stared back with confusion, wishing that he had taken an earlier flight and never met this guy. As attractive as he might have been. Just as he was about to respond, something seemed to catch Ethan’s eye outside of the window. As Benji turned to look, he saw men in suits exiting an SUV, guns on their belts. This did not look good. Before he knew it, a hand was grabbing him and pulling him from the booth.

“I’m sorry about this.” The whisper came only seconds before Ethan was yelling, holding a gun in the air. “Everybody get down!” Ethan held him against his chest, firing the gun once into the ceiling as people ran and cowered from the gun. “Nobody move! Or I kill myself and then him!”

“Ethan, that doesn’t make-”

“Shut up Benjamin.” The response was hissed and he felt himself being dragged out of the back door of the cafe.

This was so not good.


	12. Benji/Ethan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 12: "Benji fussing over Ethan, after Ethan's been hurt?"

“Ohmygod.”

“Benji, focus.”

“I know, but-“

“Benji! You’ll be no good to any of us if you get hit too. Now stay. Focused.”

A reluctant ‘Fine’ followed along with silence as Benji worked frantically to finish his job. The sooner he completed his hack, the sooner Brandt could get the samples and the sooner he could get to Ethan. He had seen it all happen on his monitor, the security footage capturing the exact moment that Ethan was hit by a wayward bullet. He had been helpless to do nothing but watch the screen as Ethan dropped to his knees and fell into the small stream that was next to him. Now, his heart was racing, his stomach dropping and all he could think of was the overwhelming desire to be at Ethan’s side, to make sure that he was ok.

Ethan’s voice resounded in his mind. _“We can’t let our feelings get in the way of a mission. Once that happens, we’re done for.”_ Benji had wanted to call Ethan out for that, after watching him ready to die in order to secure Benji’s release from Lane’s clutches in London, but he knew that would solve nothing. And now, as he sat in his chair, fingers flying over the keys of his laptop, eyes flicking to that particular monitor every few seconds with the hope that he might see some form of movement, some kind of sign that Ethan was alive, he prayed to a god he did not believe in that everything would be alright.

Time seemed to move so slowly, his wrists beginning to ache from the speed he was typing his override codes at and he wiped a bead of sweat from his cheek – or was that a tear? – as he silently begged Ethan to hold on for him. He couldn’t lose him, not after everything they had been through. Benji hadn’t been strapped to a bomb only to see Ethan die by a stray bullet.

“Alright, I’m in.” Brandt’s voice sounded like that of an angel as he saw on another monitor that his friend had acquired the samples and was beginning his retreat. “Go.” That one word was all he needed and he was packing up his things at a frantic pace, breathing ragged while he gathered up all items and sprinted through the door. He ran faster than he ever had before, faster than he had when escaping the Kremlin, faster than any race; in that moment, he truly believed he probably would have outrun Ethan himself. All he could think about was Ethan’s safety and he used that as fuel for his movements.

When he reached the edge of the stream where Ethan had gone down, he dropped his things, not caring for them in any way, and he jumped from the path down into the shallow water.

“Ethan!” His voice was desperate as he searched the dimly lit area for signs of his partner. “Ethan!” There was a small noise, one that he instantly recognised as a sound of pain and he followed it, splashing through the water until his eyes fell on a familiar figure lying on the edge of the stream. “Ethan, oh christ, Ethan!” He all but threw himself down next to the older agent, ignoring the blood as he reached out and placed a hand on his neck. He was ice cold, but there was a pulse and that was all that mattered. “Ethan, can you hear me?” He moved his hand to his boyfriend’s cheek, watching as Ethan’s face scrunched up slightly and a cough escaped him. He was alive, but he needed medical attention. Without hesitating, Benji removed his jacket and sought out the source of Ethan’s pain, finding the bullet wound in his right side. Firmly yet not too hard, he pressed his jacket against it in an attempt to stem the flow of blood which was not supposed to be outside of Ethan’s body.

He heard the sound of a vehicle pulling up nearby followed by Brandt’s voice calling his name.

“Down here!” he cried back, his own voice a little more deflated as he fought back his emotions. _Don’t let yourself lose composure, Dunn. Keep it together. For him._ He looked back down at Ethan’s face, clenching his teeth together. _Hold on, Ethan… Please._

——–

Minutes felt like hours. Hours felt like days and before he knew it, Benji had been sitting in that same hospital chair for almost a week. He felt as though he had left an imprint of himself in the uncomfortable leather from his time spent sitting in it. The doctors had cleared Ethan of any long term consequences of his injury, but it was now simply a matter of twiddling his thumbs until he woke up. He stared at Ethan’s sleeping form, the rise and fall of his chest providing an overwhelming sensation of relief, though his worries were not gone yet. He still could not rid his mind of Ethan’s motionless body lying in the water, blood staining everything in the vicinity. But he forced himself to focus on that simple movement of Ethan’s torso and held onto that with every ounce of his being. Because Ethan was alive.

It was another hour before his wish was finally granted, those green eyes finally opening for the first time in what felt like a lifetime. The sound of Ethan’s groggy voice saying his name, accusing Benji of looking like crap, which of course made him laugh. Everything that followed the moment Ethan’s eyes opened was a blur because all he could do was smile with relief. Too many times he had faced the possibility of losing Ethan and each time was just as horrible as the last.

“Please stop scaring me like that.” Benji whispered, lifting Ethan’s hand and kissing it, before resting his forehead against it.

“I’ll try.” Was all Ethan could respond, because in their line of work, no promises could be made.

——–

“Ow.” The sound of discomfort escaped him involuntarily as he reached for his favourite mug and he instantly regretted it when he heard what came next.

“What the hell are you doing?!”

“Nothing. Just like you told me.” Ethan turned to see Benji staring at him with his arms folded across his chest. The stare made Benji’s demands very clear and Ethan sighed, crossing the apartment and sitting back down on the sofa. “You know I love you, but please don’t quit your day job because you’re a terrible nurse.”

“All the best nurses look after their patients, Hunt.” Benji replied, watching him go but never leaving his side just to be safe. “Cruel to be kind. What were you trying to do? I mean, besides tear your stitches, of course.”

“I need coffee.” Ethan replied.

“And you couldn’t take one of the mugs from the drying rack? You just had to have one of the mugs on the highest possible shelf, didn’t you?” Benji stared down at Ethan with a raised eyebrow causing the older man to roll his eyes.

“Yes. I wanted that one you bought me.” Benji’s face softened at Ethan’s response and he turned and looked at the still open cupboard, laughing when he saw the mug Ethan had wanted.

“You know I could have got that down for you, right?” Benji replied, moving back to the kitchen to get the mug down – the mug which read “WORLDS BEST BOYFRIEND” on the side.

“I don’t like having to rely on you like this.” Ethan replied, shrugging off his own comment.

“I knew I should have gotten you the ‘world’s most stubborn arsehole’ mug instead.” Benji joked, turning on the kettle and spooning some coffee into the mug. “I get that you hate being fussed over. I know you looked after yourself for six months and dealt with a gunshot wound just fine… But the thing is, why insist on doing that when you’ve got me to help you?” Benji moved back to sit next to him on the sofa, looking him in the eye. “I’m not gonna do everything for you, I’m not a smotherer like that.”

“Benji, smotherer is not a wor-”

“Don’t ruin the moment, Ethan, I’m being sappy.”

“Right. Of course.” Ethan smiled fondly at Benji’s interruption and let him continue.

“Just because you’ve done this alone before doesn’t mean you have to this time.” The blond reached out and took Ethan’s hand in his own, giving it a light squeeze. “You don’t have to be the big strong agent all the time, ok? Let me fuss over you.” Ethan lifted Benji’s hand and pressed his lips to the back in a tender kiss before leaning over and kissing him properly. It was short and gentle, but Benji knew that there was unspoken gratitude in the action.

“I’ll let you fuss.” Ethan replied.

“Good.” Benji replied, standing up as the kettle beeped. “Because you weren’t going to have a choice in the matter.” He leant down and planted a kiss on the top of Ethan’s head and moved back to the kitchen to finish Ethan’s coffee.

“Didn’t think I would.”

“See? You’re learning already!”


	13. Jane, Ethan & Benji

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 13: "Jane Carter meeting up with the IMF boys and finding out what happened to Benji in Rogue Nation."

It felt good to be back. She had been away on a deep cover mission when she received word that the IMF had been shut down and remained where she was to finish what she started. It was a long six months, but now that she had been informed that IMF was back up and running, she was home and it had never felt so good. After a good night’s sleep, she decided to visit HQ to see how Ethan and the others were doing. She had heard through the grapevine that they were to blame for the IMF being reinstated so she figured that she at least owed them a thank you.

She found Benji first, standing in the break room making himself a cup of coffee. She had always been so fond of Benji, ever since she first met him after his field exam. He had always been so wide eyed, so optimistic. He found a reason to smile in any situation and would do his best to give everyone else a reason to smile too. He was a bright spot in her life, particularly after she lost Trevor, so she was glad to find him here. She had missed his presence.

Quietly, she crossed the room and approached him from behind, wanting to surprise him. She reached around and gently covered his eyes, however before she could say “Guess who”, things went to hell. Suddenly, Benji was spinning around, fist balled and arm swinging out in a strong right hook. Luckily for Jane, she had always prided herself on her fast reflexes and she caught his wrist in her hand just before it connected with her face.

“Benji, what was th-” She cut herself off when she saw the moment of realisation in Benji’s eyes and the next thing she knew, he was sliding down the kitchen counter until he was sitting on the ground, knees bent up to his chest.

“I’m sorry… Bloody hell, I’m so sorry, Jane.” One hand came up to cover his eyes, his posture closed off and she sensed that he might have even been fighting back tears. His breathing was becoming rapid and shallow, chest rising and falling all too fast and she dropped down next to him with a comforting hand on his shoulder.

“Benji, deep breaths, ok? Deep breaths, honey.” Out of the corner of her eye, she saw a familiar figure rushing over and once she felt Ethan settling beside her, she turned to face him.

“Benji? What happened?” Ethan asked, glancing between the technician and Jane.

“I have no idea, I surprised him and he took a swing at me.” She replied, concern growing within her at high speed. Both agents knelt next to him until finally, after what felt like a lifetime, Benji’s breathing returned to normal and the blond sagged against the counter.

“I’m ok… I’m good. I’m sorry about that, Jane.” Benji’s voice was a little shaky and Jane ran her hand over his hair.

“It’s fine, Benji.” she replied, offering him a small smile. Offering him a hand, she helped him to his feet and led him to the table, making sure he was sitting down comfortably. “Will you be ok here for a minute?” When Benji nodded in response, she turned to her right. “A word, please, Ethan.” The pair rose to their feet and moved from the break room into a nearby office, still allowing them to keep an eye on their friend.

“Ok, you mind telling me what that just was?” Jane asked once the door was closed, pointing to where Benji sat. “Because that man right there, the man who almost had a panic attack when I gave him a surprise, is not the same man I said goodbye to eight months ago.” She saw the way Ethan’s shoulders sagged, the emotions that seemed so raw on his face and she knew that something awful had happened. “What happened to him, Ethan?”

Running a hand through his hair, Ethan sighed and leant against the wall, trying to find a way to explain. “Remember I told you about the Syndicate?”

“The terrorist organisation that-”

“Yes, that no one believed me about.” Ethan replied, averting his gaze, finding a spec of fluff on the carpet to stare at. “Benji helped me tracking down their leader, Solomon Lane; he was the only one who really trusted me on it. We were closing in on him, had information that he needed to continue his work. Lane abducted Benji to force me to give him what he wanted.” He heard Jane’s sharp intake of breath at the revelation, not looking forward to what would come next.

“What did they do to him?” she asked, heart aching for her friend.

“They… They strapped a bomb to his chest and forced him to a crowded restaurant and made him sit there waiting for me.”

“Jesus…” Jane covered her mouth with a hand, feeling sick to the stomach at the thought of Benji going through that. Sure, their jobs were dangerous, but when something like this happened, especially to someone like Benji…

“It was my fault.” The admission from Ethan confused Jane, her brown eyes searching Ethan’s face for what he meant. “Lane took him to get to me. He knew that Benji was important, he knew that I would do anything to protect him. I tried to make him leave, I knew it was too much of a risk letting him get involved but he insisted and I backed down. I should have pushed him more, this wouldn’t have happened, he wouldn’t be like this.”

“Hey, Ethan, none of this is your fault, ok?” Jane stepped over to him, taking one of his hands in her own. “You and I both know how stubborn Benji can be. He cares about you a lot, there’s no way he ever would have left you to fight them alone.”

Ethan recalled Benji’s words in Vienna.

_“I am a field agent, I know the risks.”_

To him, just because Benji knew the risks didn’t mean he should have to face them. But he knew that Jane had a point. Benji was a grown man, if he wanted to stay with Ethan, he would have stayed whether Ethan wanted him to or not. But that still did not stop him from feeling some form of guilt deep inside of him.

“Yeah. It’s just difficult seeing him like this. He’s always so-”

“Positive, optimistic, happy.”

“Yeah. He’s just- he doesn’t deserve this.” Ethan looked out, seeing that Benji was now back making his coffee.

“He’ll get through it. Just like I got through after Trevor and you after Julia.” Jane placed a hand around Ethan’s shoulders and gave him a half hug. “But we just have to be there for him. As long as he knows that he can come to us, then that’s all we can do. He’ll make it.”

Ethan gave a weak smile and nodded. “Yeah. He will.”


	14. Benji/Ethan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 14: "Ethan x Benji one similar to the opening to mission impossible 3"

It was like déjà vu.

Out of all of the things that he had ever been through during his years with the IMF, if he had to pick three that he would rather die than face again, this would be one of them. Another would be sitting across a restaurant table from Benji, watching him fighting back tears as those little red numbers counted down all too fast yet painfully slow at the same time. Sadly, this situation right now was a combination of those two memories and his brain was beginning to go into meltdown.

He could not do this again, not after last time. Not after the pain that he had felt with each word, each number, each pull of the trigger. But what made this ten times worse, was that it was real. Of course, at the time, he had thought it was real with Julia, but he later found it to be a lie; she wasn’t dead. But this time, he knew without a single sliver of a doubt that it was real and that made his heart pound against his chest as though it would tear open his rib cage just to burst through.

He tugged at the restraints around his wrists, the metal of the handcuffs digging into his skin, chafing it and rubbing it raw as he tried his hardest to break free. He knew that he would not be able to, he could not even snap the metal arms of the chair the cuffs were attached to, but he was not going to simply sit there and watch. His ankles were bound too, leaving him helpless and desperate.

“Come now, Agent Hunt.” The voice had been taunting him ever since he had woken in the chair, rasping and low, reminding him far too much of Solomon Lane for his liking. “I know you care about your friends, you care about their well being. You care for those you love. I don’t take you for the man who would put the importance of information like this over his life. Just tell me where the weapons are located and we can make this all go away.” The man, Francis Chambers, an older man with greying hair and blue eyes so piercing that they sent a shiver down Ethan’s spine, twirled the knife he was holding with a look of near child-like glee.

“I told you…” Ethan replied, voice hoarse from the amount of shouting he had already done. “I don’t know where they are. I swear.” He watched as Chambers turned and leaned in towards Benji, lips far too close to his ear making Ethan want to tear him apart even more.

“How does it feel, Benjamin, to know that the man you admire doesn’t seem to care for your life?” he asked, a chill running down the tech’s spine. But he could not answer, despite the desire to tell him where he could shove his weapons, for the foul tasting rag that had been shoved into his mouth kept any and all threats silence. His arms were aching, pulled roughly above him and bound in chains that left him dangling from the ceiling, the toes of his boots just barely scraping the cold concrete floor beneath him and he tried to throw Ethan some kind of reassuring glance. But that glance became a wince as he felt the blade of Chambers’ knife gliding down the bare skin of his bicep, causing him to bite into the gag to prevent any sound from escaping. He heard the sound of Ethan struggling against his restraints once more, quickly followed by the sound of a fist connecting with what he knew was the older agent’s face and he opened his eyes to see Ethan spitting out blood.

“Shall we try this one more time, Hunt?” Chambers asked, voice seeming to echo around them. “Where are the weapons?”

“Please… Chambers, just listen to me, ok? I swear to you, I don’t know where they are. You say you know me, I wouldn’t put my friends in danger for the sake of information. You’re right, I wouldn’t. If I knew where they were, I would have told you already, just please… Leave Benji out of this.” Ethan’s voice was that of a desperate man, wavering and breaking with each word. Seeing Benji like this, seeing his life on the line for the sake of information once more killed him, even more so since this time, he did not have the information that Chambers wanted. He could not barter with him the way he did Lane, he could not buy Benji’s freedom with the right words. This was a losing battle.

Then came the sound of Benji’s scream, almost piercing his ears as the blade was plunged into his upper thigh, blood immediately soaking the light blue denim that surrounded the wound. The blond’s ragged breathing seemed so loud in Ethan’s ears as he felt tears beginning to well up in his eyes. He had thought that nothing could be worse than seeing the fear in Benji’s eyes as the bomb ticked down to his death in London, but hearing the agony he was in as he swung from those chains was possibly worse.

“Please!” Ethan yelled, shaking his head when the blade was removed from Benji’s leg, the sight of his blood coating the blade, contrasting the silver with its deep red colour making him sick. This was not supposed to happen. They had not been on a mission, they had been having dinner at Ethan’s home. They were somewhere they were supposed to be safe, where no one could reach them, no one could harm them. Yet that sanctuary had been shattered, ripped away from them as they had been dragged from the house late at night. And now, what had been a lovely night in with his partner was now some kind of hell.

“I’m sorry Agent Hunt.” Chambers finally spoke up again as he fixed his grip on the knife and readied it for another blow. “I guess you’ll have to try and remember where the weapons are before your precious agent bleeds out.” He swung the blade down towards Benji’s abdomen, just as the sound of the doors bursting open made them all jump. The fright caused Chambers’ body to shift, the movement of his arm altering slightly, just enough to prevent the knife from burying itself to the hilt in Benji’s stomach, but it still gouged a significant gash into the blond’s side as armed IMF agents swarmed them. The next few seconds were a blur for Ethan as he focused on Benji, hearing shouts around him as their agents slammed Chambers and his men into the ground. He heard the familiar sound of Brandt’s voice nearby, saying what he thought was his name, but he could not be sure. He was too fixated on the blood seeping through Benji’s shirt. He felt Brandt’s hands working on the cuffs that still bound Ethan’s wrists and the second they were free, he was rushing to his feet. He swayed, feeling the analyst’s hands on his shoulders to steady him.

“Ethan, you need to-“

“Benji.” Ethan pushed away from Brandt and moved to where Luther stood, just lowering Benji down to the ground. “Benji…” Ethan repeated, kneeling down next to him as he looked into the younger man’s blue eyes. The tech managed a weak smile before wincing as he felt Luther pressing something against his side to stem the bleeding.

“I’m so sorry, Benj.” Ethan whispered, gripping Benji’s hand in his own. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be, Ethan.” The tech replied, linking his fingers with his partner’s. “We didn’t give him the information. That’s what matters.”

“Yeah, because we didn’t know. And look where that got you.” Ethan replied, shaking his head a little.

“You didn’t know.” Ethan paused at Benji’s words, brow furrowing as he stared down at him. “He assumed you had the information because you’re the team leader. He didn’t stop to think that the technician who helped design the security system of the building these weapons are stored in would know.”

“Benji, why didn’t you say something?” Ethan asked, a mixture of emotions evident in his eyes as he wondered. “You could have saved yourself all of this.”

“And caused it to happen to you.” Benji explained, honestly. “I knew the second he found out I had the information, he would have turned that blade on you and I was not going to let that happen.”

Before Ethan could respond, Luther’s voice interrupted. “Ethan, we need to move.”

“Right, right… Hospital..”

Benji nodded in agreement, a soft yet tired smile on his face. “Yes please. Hospital.”


	15. Benji & Ethan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 15: "Ethan and benji go for a drink following Janes departure from the team."

The cool night air breezed past their cheeks, leaving them with a soft pink glow as the pair sat in the bar, Benji having just brought over two beers and placed them on their table. A nod of silent thanks is given by Ethan and he picks up his bottle, taking a large gulp resulting in a contented sigh.

“It’s gonna feel really weird.” Benji said after a few moments of silence.

“I know…” Ethan replied, looking over at him. “I know how much she means to you.”

“She’s been like a sister to me since I first got out in the field. From day one, she was right there by my side. Hanaway too, of course, but I dunno, Jane just always stuck around, even when she didn’t need to.” The tech took a drink of his beer and placed it down on the table, peeling absentmindedly at the label. “Don’t get me wrong, I’m really happy for her, if anyone deserves an opportunity like this, it’s Jane. It’s just gonna be really weird without her around.”

“You know, we might still get to work with her again. She’s not gone entirely.” Ethan offered, glancing around at the bar.

“Oh yeah, I know that. But it would have been nice if she could have stayed on this team. But the fact that they asked her to join the field agent training team was something she really seemed excited about.” Benji gave a fond smile as he remembered Jane telling him about the position. She would be working as assistant to the lead combat trainer, being in line to take over once he was ready to retire. It was a huge opportunity and he was so happy for her. “Though, I must say I am _so_ glad that I’m not taking the field exam now. I wouldn’t want to be her trainees.”

Ethan laughed at that. “God, she’s gonna put them through their paces and then some.” he replied, picking up his beer bottle and raising it a little. “To Jane.”

Benji smiled at the other man at his gesture and mirrored his action, holding his bottle high with a nod. “To Jane.”


	16. Benji

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 16: Not a prompt fic, but just a short one following Benji during his kidnapping in the train station.

This is certainly unexpected. 

After all of our concerns about the disc falling into Lane’s hands, he doesn’t have it. We have it. Part of me wants to be happy about this, but I know that it is far from over. Lane isn’t exactly going to roll over and surrender because his plan failed this time. No, I know that he will find another way, just as Ilsa has said to Ethan. Our options right now are limited and we need to think of something. Fast.

I see her sliding what appears to be a phone over the table to Ethan. A message. From Lane, no doubt, and I can’t help feel concern at what this message might be, how Lane plans to get what he wants this time. 

But then, I feel a hand at the base of my neck, a sharp stinging there to coincide with the horrendous screeching in my ear and by the time it stops, I know it’s too late. My world is already starting to swim, two men either side of me, holding me upright as I’m guided towards the entrance to the parking garage. I can’t fight, I can’t call out. Whatever it is is working fast and all I can do is hope that Ethan has realised before-

My vision is blurring and I can just make out the shape of a dark coloured van ahead of me, the door slid wide open waiting for me. But by the time I’ve reached it, I’m unable to stand, I am helpless and that both terrifies and angers me. I feel myself being flung into the back of the vehicle, thinking on how Lane still managed to be one step ahead of us, and as my head hits the floor or the van, everything goes dark.


	17. Ethan/Benji

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 17: "Benji tries to protect Ethan and gets hurt and in Hospital Ethan tells Benji that he’s sorry and about his feelings for him and he thinks Benji can’t hear him but he does"

It had been five months since Solomon Lane had been taken down, five months since the remaining members of the Syndicate had scattered, leaving the newly reinstated IMF to locate them. It was nice for Benji to have something to focus on. While all of the men involved in his abduction were either dead or imprisoned, it felt good to be tracking down and dealing with those who aided them in some way over the years.

They had managed to locate a handful of agents in Europe so had split up in order to track them down and bring them in (or kill, as Hunley had ordered them - although he did was information from them, he did not seem too bothered by a few being lost along the way for what they had done). Brandt and Luther had gone to locate agents in Dublin, Jane was searching Krakow while Ethan and Benji had been sent to Moscow. Benji had of course cracked a joke about the last time they were in Moscow, with Brandt claiming to be shocked that Hunley thought it was safe sending Ethan there after his speech on their supposed involvement in the Kremlin bombing.

They had tracked the agent (or agents) down to a relatively small warehouse on the outskirts of the city, waiting until quite late in the evening to make their move. They made their way through the building as silently as they could, weapons at the ready, but something seemed off.

“Why do I have a feeling that they know we’re coming?” Benji whispered, glancing around. Everything was too quiet. If their Syndicate agent was here, he would have surely been making some kind of noise, going about his business or anything. But you could hear a pin drop in the building and that concerned the blond.

“Because they probably do.” Ethan replied, voice equally as hushed. Before either of them could say anything else, a figure rammed Ethan from the side, sending him tumbling to the ground. His weapon flew from his hands, skidding across the concrete floor as his head smacked into the wall, knocking him out cold. The man who had attacked him gripped a knife from his belt and swung it up to stab the agent, but Benji was quick to act, firing his weapon twice into the stranger’s chest. As he fell to the ground in a lifeless heap, Benji made to rush across to Ethan’s aid, but lurched forwards when someone slammed him from the back. The force caused his grip on his gun to loosen, sending the gun clattering to the ground and he stumbled, just managing to keep his footing before turning to face the second attacker. Positioning himself between the agent and Ethan’s motionless form, he took on a fighting stance ready for whatever was to come. Reaching into his jacket, the man produced a blade much like the one that their first attacker had intended to use on Ethan and gave Benji a smirk.

“Not fair.” the tech mumbled, taking in a deep breath before rushing towards him. He threw his fists out, first his left, fooling the man into dodging before giving a sharp right hook. The blow was hard and fast but the agent recovered quickly, headbutting Benji with full force. He stumbled backwards a little, his balance feeling momentarily off from the hit and while he was dazed, he felt a sharp pain in his left bicep. He cried out, immediately putting his hand to where he felt blood beginning to seep through his jacket. A quick glance up revealed blood on the blade that he was holding and there was a smug look on his face. Clenching his teeth, Benji was done with this. He couldn’t deal with this guy, not while Ethan was possibly hurt. With quick and precise movements, he sped forwards, gripping the man’s wrist in his. He then twisted, pulling his arm around before shoving the man’s own fist into his face. One last twist and shove and the blade pierced their attacker’s stomach.

There was a moment where everything went still, the man collapsing to the floor as blood pooled around him and after letting the previous few moments sink in, Benji rushed over to Ethan. Dropping to his knees, he saw that the older agent was beginning to stir.

“Oh thank fuck.” Benji breathed, smiling slightly as Ethan slowly sat up. “Are you ok?”

“Mmm… I think so…” Ethan looked around, spotting the two dead agents lying across from him. “Did I miss something?”

“You could say that.” Benji replied with a chuckle, however that soon changed. He winced, gasping in pain and Ethan’s face immediately became concerned.

“What’s wrong? Benji?” The tech pulled off his jacket to reveal the thin gash caused by the blade. What had been just a normal cut was now turning the skin around it a very sickening shade of grey and Ethan’s stomach turned.

“Caught me with a knife.” Benji replied, teeth gritting together to bite back a cry. Sweat was beginning to gather on his forehead and Ethan could see that his pupils were dilated. This was not a good sign.

“They must have dipped the blade in something…” _Some kind of poison_ … Ethan’s heart was pounding as he saw Benji’s chest rising and falling slightly faster. “We need to get you out of here. Now.” Ethan reached out as he began to stand, pulling Benji up with him. He needed to get Benji to a hospital as fast as he could; he had no idea what kind of substance that blade had been laced with but it was clearly intended to cause trouble.

——–

Ethan startled awake with Benji’s name on his lips, feeling a hand on his shoulder. He recalled seeing the moments before the doctors had whisked Benji away from him, how he had deteriorated on their drive to the hospital, how he had to carry the younger agent into the building bridal style because he was barely conscious. The nurses had insisted on checking out the cut Ethan had sustained to the back of his head, despite his protests. He wasn’t even sure what time he had last seen Benji but he knew that right now it was almost 9am.

“Mr Hunt?” He looked up and saw a man standing over him.

“Yes? Benji.” Ethan couldn’t quite get more than those few words out, the only thing on his mind being Benji. He needed to know how he was.

“Mr Dunn is going to make a full recovery.” Those were the words that Ethan had been longing to hear. His lack of sleep combined with the overwhelming relief of hearing that Benji was going to be alright caused him to zone out slightly, causing him to miss most of what the doctor was telling him, only catching words here and there. “-waiting for him to wake. Would you like to see him?”

“Yes. Yes please.”

——–

“You scared me, Benj. You really scared me because…” Ethan trailed off as he spoke softly to Benji’s sleeping form. “I almost lost you once, that was once too many. Thinking that I could lose you again…” Carefully, he reached out and took hold of the younger man’s hand, leaning forwards as he took slow deep breaths. His outer shell, that hardened, seasoned agent exterior was beginning to fall away as he felt his emotions rushing forwards. “I was so scared when Lane had you. Seeing the empty spot where you had been, seeing that footage of them throwing you into the van… God, knowing that Vinter was the one who took you knowing what he was capable of. I was scared. I know if you were awake right now you’d probably laugh and say something about how I’m scared of nothing but no. I was scared that day. Because your life was in my hands and all I could do was hope that I didn’t get you killed.”

“Thing is… Benji, I’m more scared of losing you now because… Because you mean so much to me. So much. More than I think you could ever realise. I’ve wanted to let you know for a while now, since before Lane. There’s a reason why I turned to you over anyone else. I’d trust you with my life because I-” He paused, unsure of how to get the words out. Just before he could try to figure out his next comments, before he could figure out how to tell Benji how he truly felt, he felt a small squeeze to his hand. He lifted his head and saw Benji’s eyes were now open, those familiar blue eyes seeming tired yet still somehow holding that perfect glint that was so _Benji_.

“Benj… Are you ok? I mean, of course you’re not ok but how are you feeling?”

“Been better.” The blond’s voice was croaky but it was there. There was a soft smile on his face as he looked over to Ethan.

“Did, uh… Did you hear anything that I… said?” Ethan asked, wondering how long Benji had been awake before he had realised.

“You mean about you sounding like you were going to say that you loved me? Nope, didn’t hear a thing.” The response was delivered with a straight face before the corner of Benji’s lips twitched up into a smile.

“Ah. Yeah… About that.”

“Is it true?” Ethan paused at the question, running a hand through his hair.

“Yeah.” The word was almost a breath, Ethan’s green eyes meeting Benji’s gaze and searching for something that he hoped would be positive. “Is that ok?”

“Considering I’ve had to bribe a considerably large portion of the techs back at the lab to not mention the feelings I’ve had for you for a rather long time, yeah. I think it’s ok.” Benji laughed at Ethan’s expression, his wide eyes so out of place on his usually together face. “That’s cute.”

“What’s cute?”

“Kick arse IMF agent Ethan Hunt can predict how a highly dangerous criminal is going to respond to threats yet apparently didn’t see this.” Benji replied, a small smile on his lips and a slight hint of pink in his cheeks. “Honestly I thought Luther would never give up with his pushing for me to make a move.”

“I guess last night could be considered you making your move.” Ethan replied with a gentle smile, letting his thumb rub soothingly over the back of Benji’s hand.

“Hmm?” Benji’s head tilted to the side (which Ethan couldn’t help finding adorable).

“You fought those men while I was unconscious. You took them out and stopped them killing me, almost getting yourself killed in the process.”

“Not like you’ve never risked your life for me before.” Benji’s words were spoken matter-of-factly and he shrugged a bit. “You seem to do that on a frequent basis, actually.”

“Well, I guess it’s what you do for someone you love.” The confession was met with a warm grin from the tech and he returned it with equal genuineness.

“Yeah.” Benji agreed. “I guess that’s true.”


	18. Ethan/Benji

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 18: "Benji having a nightmare where all the team except him and it's his fault ? Or the bomb in London killing Ethan and Ilsa but he's still alive."

_It was all so real, so clear. Ethan was still trying to force Lane’s hand, trying to buy Benji’s freedom with his own. Benji couldn’t be sure what his kidnapper was thinking, as all had fallen silent on the other end of the earpiece. Was he considering it? Surely he would not let his only chance at getting the disc be blown to pieces?_

_He could not see the numbers on his own chest, but he heard the beeping speeding up, saw the look of fear on Ilsa’s face. It was getting closer and Lane was still silent. Then, after what felt like an eternity, he spoke up again. Another instruction for him to utter._

_“Goodbye Ethan.” Benji said it, tears rolling down his cheeks as he tried not to close his eyes, wanting the last thing he saw to be Ethan. At the very last second, however, he closed them. He could not risk seeing anything. Not that he thought he would, since he would no doubt be the first to go._

_Then it happened. The sound was so loud in his ears and the pain hit him, but he did not die. It did not end. He felt the pain, the burning, heard the screams of people around him. Why was he not dead? Why was he still thinking and feeling and hearing? He dared to open his eyes, hoping that perhaps he was just having a really bad dream, maybe this whole kidnapping was just an awful nightmare._

_But it wasn’t._

_Around him, he saw flames, the smell of burning flesh making him want to vomit, but he wasn’t even sure if he had a stomach of his own anymore. Across from him, there was no Ethan anymore. No Ilsa. There was nothing. Just burning tables and bodies and…. death. They were gone. Ethan was dead. How could he have lived through this and Ethan not? He wanted to cry, wanted to scream, but he could not form tears nor words. Instead, he squeezed his eyes shut and tried to ignore the sounds of screaming and sirens as-_

He sat bolt upright in his bed, gasping for breath. Sweat made his hair stick to his forehead as he looked around. Hotel room. They were in their safe house in London still. Alive. Safe. He noticed that the bed was empty next to him and a glance to the balcony doors told him where Ethan had gone. Carefully, wiping the tears from his eyes, he stood up and made his way across the room, sliding open the door. He saw Ethan beginning to turn, body tense until he saw who was behind him. 

“What are you doing out here?” Benji asked, stepping out into the cool night air. 

“Needed some fresh air.” Ethan replied, forcing a smile to his boyfriend. Benji moved forwards and leaned on the railing next to him. 

“Couldn’t sleep.” Ethan couldn’t tell if Benji was asking that of him or stating it about himself, but he did not respond verbally. Instead, he gently wrapped his arm around the younger man, letting him lean against him as they listened to the sounds of cars passing in the streets below.


	19. Ethan/Benji

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 19: Ethan and Benji adopting a kid

It was close to one in the morning when Ethan awoke to a soft sound drifting out of the baby monitor, the agent lifting his head to check the time. When he glanced over to Benji’s side of the bed, he noticed that his husband was not there and an instinctive feeling inside him began to twist and turn in his stomach. He couldn’t help it. Even though it had been three years, ever since Lane had managed to steal Benji away from right under his nose, he had not been able to shake that feeling of concern whenever Benji disappeared without warning. But after a few seconds of sleep-filled, internal panic, he realised that the sounds coming from the monitor sounded awfully like the younger man’s voice and he relaxed slightly.

Swinging his legs off the edge of the bed, he rubbed at his eyes and stood up, making his way out of their bedroom and two rooms down the hallway of their modest home to the nursery. It was quite dark, though a sliver of moonlight through the window combined with his familiarity with the path he reached the room without stubbing his toe (unlike the first few nights). When he stood in the doorway, he spotted a sight that filled him with warmth.

Benji stood in the middle of the room, holding their son in his arms as he gently rocked from side to side. The child was almost asleep, tiny fingers twisting in the material of Benji’s t-shirt as the blond softly sang to him. Ethan had to admit, he loved the sound of his husband’s singing. To avoid startling him, Ethan cleared his throat and then stepped over.

“Mozart? Really?” he asked, a smile on his face as he rested his chin on Benji’s shoulder.

“Mmhmm.” the other replied, voice hushed. “If I do anything right by him, he is going to grow up with a good taste in music.”

“And what about the songs I sing?” Ethan sounded a little hurt by that, though it was clearly in jest.

“Oh, there’s nothing wrong with the songs you sing, love.” Benji said with a soft chuckle. “But Def Leppard and Scorpions hardly make for good lullabies.” The words made Ethan laugh and he kissed the younger man on the cheek. “Do you think he’s settled?” 

Ethan ran a hand over the little boy’s soft hair, smiling down at him fondly. “I think so.” He carefully took the child from Benji, cradling him in his arms before kissing his forehead and slowly placing him back into his cot. “Night Jack.” he whispered. “Daddy and Papa love you.”

Benji smiled at Ethan and then leaned against him, feeling Ethan’s arm wrap around him. “And Daddy loves Papa too.”

“I should hope so.” Ethan replied, chuckling as he steered his husband out of the room and back to bed.


	20. Benji/Brandt

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 20: A ficlet that involves Benji/Brandt and slow dancing

It was their first proper date night since it had happened. When they had returned from London, all Benji had wanted to do was sleep for a month, though his nightmares had made sure that didn’t happen. Will made sure to stay at Benji’s as often as he could, not wanting his boyfriend to be alone when dealing with the fallout he knew would come. Will knew what it was like; his situation had been different, but the nightmares after Croatia had caused him grief for a long time, until Ethan told him the truth about Julia, he had still had them up to that day. So he got it and he wanted Benji to have the support that he never did.

It had been almost three weeks since it happened and Benji was finally starting show signs of settling, so Will decided to take him out to dinner. He book a table at the same restaurant where he had taken Benji for their first date and made it a nice surprise for the younger agent. He hoped that it would be a perfect night.

As it turned out, it was. There was only one moment where Benji had any kind of issue, but it was only minor and Will had simply reached out and took his partner’s hand in his own, giving it a gentle squeeze.

“I’m right here.” He had whispered, and it brought Benji back from his momentary trance-like state. The rest of the dinner went well and Benji seemed more relaxed than Will had seen him in months. That made him happy. He drove them home to Benji’s apartment, where he flicked on some background music and poured out two glasses of the best red wine he had found at the local shops, handing one to Benji.

“Thank you.” Benji whispered as they sat down on the sofa.

“For what?” Will turned to face him, placing his glass on the coffee table.

“For everything. For tonight, for being here for me, for helping get me back, for hitting that guy in Morocco… For just being you.” Benji’s voice was soft and almost vulnerable sounding as he spoke. “I honestly don’t know what I would do without you here.”

“Probably have a much more untidy apartment.” Will teased, glad to see that it resulted in a laugh from the blond. “No, but seriously. You don’t need to thank me. I love you, ok? And that means that I will go to the ends of the earth to make sure that you are happy and safe. If that means kidnapping the Prime Minister of Great Britain then so be it.”

Benji laughed again, this time a little more. “I still can’t believe Ethan managed to convince you to be part of that.” he replied. “I wish I could have seen Hunley’s face.”

“It was priceless.” Will agreed. “Though I have a feeling that the Prime Minister actually tried to hit on me…” Benji’s eyes went wide and he snorted. “What?”

“Look at you. Finally getting to seduce the rich guy.”

“Hey, now there’s only one person on this planet that I want to seduce.” Will said, voice quietening to a whisper as he reached up and ran the back of his fingers down Benji’s cheek. Taking the glass from the other man’s hand, Will placed it down next to his own and tugged Benji to his feet.

“What are you doing?” Benji asked, brow creased in confusion.

“Dancing.” Will’s response was spoken in a tone as if to say ‘duh’ as he tugged Benji to the middle of the room, reaching out to turn up the music slightly.

“William, you know I have two left feet.”

“Benjamin, you know I don’t care about that.” Will grinned and wrapped his arms around Benji’s waist, pulling him in close. He then took one of the blond’s hands in his own and kissed him quickly on the lips, before slowly beginning to sway to the music. Benji let his free hand side up the older man’s arm and rest on his shoulder, closing his eyes as he let Will lead him. The music was soft and relaxing and after a few seconds, he felt his eyes welling up slightly. He couldn’t pinpoint why, maybe it was the wine he had consumed at dinner, maybe it was exhaustion, maybe it was the fact that on that night in London, he had been terrified that he would never be in Will’s arms like this again. Whatever it was, he didn’t care. He focused on the slow, soothing movements of their bodies to the beat of the music to ground himself in reality, not in the memories of what could have been.

Soon, he heard a soft humming from his boyfriend, smiling at the sound as Will began to quietly sing along to the music and for the first time since everything had happened, he felt truly and completely safe.


End file.
